Amid rising national outcry for drastic community safety reform, a new study has calculated that the standard police officer training period takes place over a shorter span of time than most gay relationships.
With colleges making the change to an online environment this fall, many incoming closeted freshmen are concerned about this roadblock on their path to sexual discovery. This shift to virtual learning will be a huge blow for freshmen who, lacking in-person instruction, will be forced to wait another year until they find out if they actually enjoy kissing.
An anonymous suburban man and lifetime member of the closeted male support group called Compulsory Heterosexual Unloving Marriages (CHUMs for short), recently went public with his tragic experience during the Coronavirus pandemic—being forced to spend all of his time with his adoring wife and children.
Bar patrons fondly remembered Pam’s final lewk, which featured red stilettos and a sequined N95 mask. The crowd could be heard yelling, “you’re giving me lifeeeeee!” Unfortunately, contact tracing later confirmed they gave the performer a deadly case of the novel coronavirus.
After years of scandals and getting canceled, Internet personality James Charles is still out here… being this way. Many speculated that after making hateful comments about Africa in 2017, trans men in 2019, and said the n-word online in 2020, Charles would cease being the way that he tends to be, but actually… nope.