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TD Bank Is Making Capitalism Queer-Friendly By Selling Actual Pink Dollars
  • August 24, 2020August 24, 2020
  • Rachel Clayton

TD Bank Is Making Capitalism Queer-Friendly By Selling Actual Pink Dollars

“We’re not one of those companies that shows up to take your money during Pride,” explained Bill S. Pliss, TD Bank president, at the launch of the pink dollars. “Here at TD Bank, we want LBGTQ+ money not just during Pride, but all year long.”

ExxonMobil, Chevron, Shell Leaked As Celebrity Drag Race Finale Contestants
  • May 14, 2020September 11, 2020
  • Kris Keochinda

ExxonMobil, Chevron, Shell Leaked As Celebrity Drag Race Finale Contestants

Mama Ru invited three of her closest friends for the Secret Celebrity Drag Race finale to remind viewers that corporations are people who deserve the same rights as everybody else.

Nintendo To Release Animal Crossing ‘Pride Party’ DLC This June
  • April 24, 2020May 18, 2020
  • Siyu Song

Nintendo To Release Animal Crossing ‘Pride Party’ DLC This June

Capitalizing on the cancelled Pride celebrations, Nintendo announced they will be releasing the Pride Party downloadable content (DLC) for the popular Nintendo Switch console game this June.

Subway To Officially Round Up All Sandwiches To 7 Inches
  • April 6, 2020April 7, 2020
  • Brian Faas

Subway To Officially Round Up All Sandwiches To 7 Inches

Subway is officially rounding up their classic six-inch sub to a whopping seven inches. “Everyone says it’s about seven anyway,” a spokesperson said.

In Response To Popeyes Chicken Sandwich, Chick-Fil-A Debuts Limited Edition Tolerance Of Gays
  • December 4, 2019December 24, 2019
  • Maddy Gross

In Response To Popeyes Chicken Sandwich, Chick-Fil-A Debuts Limited Edition Tolerance Of Gays

“In order to stay competitive in the chicken sandwich market, we knew we had to make a change,” said Chick-Fil-A CEO Dan Cathy, “and that’s why we’re proud to do the bare minimum for all you perfectly tolerable queers out there. Please buy our food.”

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