Following the release of Swift’s highly popular LGBT anthem, a recent nationwide poll found that a sudden rise in anti-gay sentiment specifically from your’s truly.
“I’ve experienced a lifetime of unwanted touching at gay bars,” said patron James Tulliver. “But when the former vice president walked in, this was truly no longer a safe space.”
“Us onion rings have to fight so hard to barely see ourselves represented in media, and even then it’s as the exotic alternative to French fries. That is why we are joining forces with sweet potato fries, fried pickles, and even cole slaw to demand better visibility! Taylor Swift should be more responsible with her platform!”
“As an added bonus, the smell of the leather reminds me of his freshly polished work shoes!”