The Mayor of South Bend is reaching around for prospective queer billionaire donors by meeting them where they wank. For only $15/month catch Chasten give Pete a pre-mature congratulation for topping Biden in Iowa or the darling duo double team the price of Canadian bread.
Americans see openly gay Indiana Mayor Pete Buttigieg as someone they could sit down and grab a frosty vodka soda with. “He’s seems approachable,” said one survey participant. “I just get the vibe he’s not a beer drinker… if you know what I mean.”
Phucks-A-Ton E. Phyllis emerged shortly after sunrise only to immediately catch a glimpse of her morning-after shadow, causing her to flee back into the security of her K-hole.
After seeing the amazing new representation in the NFL, this queer fantasy football league has forgone the need for any actual players when they realized Katie Sowers would be there. Who needs a whole team of straight male athletes when you can have one lesbian with a sick undercut?
“He also didn’t care that I put Beyonce on the office happy hour playlist,” Tricia reports, although it is worth noting the song chosen was the original “Get Me Bodied” and not the remix.