A local dad is receiving effusive praise from his family for reaching a goal many thought impossible: successfully saying his daughter in law’s name correctly. Ray Szymkowiak, 64, is a world-renowned nuclear engineer by day and, with this accomplishment, a hero by night.
This special report comes courtesy of eye witness, Anthony Petcowsky, who has been waiting with bated breath for them to realize their arguments are both similar and also dumb.
Taylor Fletcher, 23, has been a fan of the show since season 4, when there were fewer than a baker’s dozen contestants and none of them were re-added to the show halfway through. In the beginning, a season of Drag Race was manageable and not life-threatening for most casual viewers.
After completing copious research on what drag queens are exactly, Mayor Pete has announced his vice president pick for his campaign’s ticket. The Buttigieg 2020 Team later clarified that Judge Judy Booty is “one of those non-dancing, non-singing, slacks-wearing drag queens.”
As per usual, straight men’s pride has been saved by their oldest ally, self-hating gays.