“I’m so proud that you volunteer your time as a mentor to a very, very large family of 78!” your father reports. “When I was your age I was too busy sleeping around!”
The only woman I can commit to is the topless pinup of Marge Simpson tattooed on the entire length of my forearm. The idea of “forever” is just so daunting.
“I want to make sure those sinners know that they’re missing out on the Kingdom of Heaven, but also that Rick is missing out on the one that got away.”
So your grandmother won’t stop praying for you to turn straight, no matter how many
