New Genre Of Gay Porn Features Police Officers Quitting Their Jobs

MINNEAPOLIS, MN— According to international data, videos falling under the gay porn genre Cops Quitting Their Jobs have seen a massive upswing in 2020. Production quality of the films ranges from amateur to fairly high budget.

 

In one video, a fully-clothed ‘Detective Simmons’ sits on the floor of a very convincing recreation of a precinct bawling like a small child for forty-seven minutes straight. “I could have done anything else,” he shriek-sobs from a deep well of shame and regret. “But I chose this!”

 

Sitting in his small home film studio, former Staten Island police officer Angelo Da Pizza spoke on what makes his cop porn scenes so popular. “I think people like how much I clearly hate myself in my videos. I really do hate myself so, so much.”

 

The content of Da Pizza’s videos isn’t overtly sexual; Da Pizza mostly angry screams at his reflection in a mirror. Still, that doesn’t stop viewers from ‘cumming buckets,’ as one commenter describes.

 

At first, porn watcher Jaiden S. was concerned about participating in the fetishization of cops. “But then I realized, it’s the idea of a cop losing their benefits package that does it for me,” Jaiden explained.

 

Popular website fuckpigs.com has a strict policy to hire actors only–no current or former cops. Performers are required to undergo a background check to ensure they have never worked in law enforcement.

 

“We don’t want cops–even former cops–to profit off the studio’s work,” explains producer Mark Falcon. “Plus, having a cop on set would be a huge safety liability and put my whole crew at risk. That alone isn’t worth it.”

 

There have also been noticeable rises in searches for Moment of Sentencing Congressman, ICE Officer Finally Hit With Full Weight of Crimes Against Humanity, and DC in Flames No Survivors.

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